“No” Your Boundaries: An Open Letter to New Teachers …
My first teaching interview was a disaster. I was twenty-eight and fresh off my second degree. I needed a job. Bad. And I think it showed. When asked what I was willing to do in terms of extracurricular activities, I said whatever was needed of me. I said I would do it all. French Club? Sure! I was in French Immersion from kindergarten to grade five. Jazz Band? Absolutely! I played guitar when I was a kid. I’m sure I could pick up the rest quickly. Yearbook? I love yearbooks! I even own one! This went on and on. I could not say no. I would have agreed to anything. Luckily, when I did land a position, the only thing initially expected of me outside of my curricular duties – which seemed to be growing more difficult by the day – was to coach the sport with the longest season … and I did … to a 0-16 record. Could I have had a better school year and season? Sure … but I was overwhelmed and my focus was on a myriad of other issues and new responsibilities so please trust me when I say this: If you’re going to survive in this profession, you’re going to have to learn to say no. A lot. You’ll need to be able to say no to administrators, coworkers, AND students. The sooner you realize this, the better off you’ll be.
Let’s start with administrators. Saying no to your administration may seem counterintuitive for a new teacher, but you have to ask yourself: Is it better to set boundaries or burn out? Would you rather have a lifelong career or be forced to walk away from the profession in a few years because of the stress? Teaching is hard enough as it is. Administrators know this; they’ve been in the trenches. Most of them will understand. Mine does. Last year was my fifteenth year teaching at my secondary school but my eighteenth year coaching in the district. Two years ago, I decided to forgo coaching high school hoops to coach my daughter’s elementary team, a move that worried me at the time because I had always felt that teachers are more susceptible to transfers if their extracurricular commitments wane. Last year, we were in dire need of a high school basketball coach and my principal asked me. I contemplated it because I feared the perceived consequences but, in the end, said no. I was already coaching both my children’s community teams and my older daughter’s elementary team. I did not have the time or the energy. And do you know what happened? She understood. And do you know who else will understand? Your coworkers.
Each http://cute-n-tiny.com/cute-animals/tiger-kitten/ cheap levitra tablet contains 100 mg of Sildenafil Citrate and 60 mg of dapoxetine. Most people get their license when they are still able to have a very satisfying sex life is important for emotional generic viagra 100mg and physical health. When the Pituitary Gland produces excess thought about this cialis online prolactin (technically known as hyperprolactinemia), the estrogen level drops and conception becomes difficult. Tadalista can help you get rid of this cheap viagra tablet disease and one of them is the use of Gingko. Every teacher I’ve ever worked with wanted to be viewed as a good team player, especially in the staffroom, and you’re probably no different. But you don’t have to go all in. A coworker needs a class covered and you can manage without your prep? Sure. A coach needs a practice or two covered? If you have the time, why not? It’s fun to get to know kids outside the classroom. The Social Committee’s looking for a location for the Christmas party? I would definitely say no but it’s up to you. But bigger asks mean bigger time commitments and you’re new to teaching so let me make this crystal clear: YOU NEED YOUR TIME! Dispense it cautiously. Life happens. Teachers go on leave for a variety of reasons; coaches decide midseason that they no longer want to coach. It is not your responsibility to fill the void. If you’re helping where you can and involved in your department’s duties, you’ve built up credit. You do not owe it to anyone to fill in. Teachers, like administrators, will understand. Unfortunately, students won’t. At least not right away.
Students have needs and it is your responsibility to meet many of them, but you must set boundaries or they will abuse you in ways administrators and coworkers never would. If you don’t learn to say no to your students, before you know it you’ll be foregoing sleep to open the weight room every morning, supervising improv three times a week, and dancing onstage to a Beyoncé song in the Friday pep rally – and that’s all on top of your regular responsibilities. Sadly, you’re going to have to say no to your students at times and, at other times, you’ll have to tell them you can help them when you’re free, not before. You can’t be everything to every kid; it’s impossible. But do you know what you can do? You can be their advocate. You can fight for them. You can care. You can be a good teacher. Then, after all that, if you have the time, you can do all the extra things that are going to make you an exceptional teacher. But, especially early in your career, you need to make sure you take care of yourself and your classroom responsibilities first AND foremost.
Look … I realize this whole piece is a tad repetitive but training new teachers is a lot like teaching teenagers: If you want them to remember something, you have to repeat yourself, especially if it’s important. Learning to say no is as valuable a skill for new teachers as learning to fix a photocopier jam. But … to be clear, I’m not saying you should boycott extracurricular activities. Advise a club if you want to contribute to your school community. Coach sports if you like. I do. But don’t take on more than you can handle; it’s a mistake too many of us make, especially early in our careers, and it affects our professional and, more importantly, our personal lives. You need to learn to say no at work so you don’t have to at home. Teachers may be superheroes but we’re not superhuman. Hopefully, now you know.
H.
